Wondering what to expect in 2009? Here are a few of the headlines you are most likely to see...

GOD DECLARED BIGOT- rik jakobs of the scourage campaign declared today that God is actually a bigot. said jakobs, "...the problem is that god has shown he disciminates against gays by keeping their numbers to only about 2% of the population. who else does god do this to? this is unacceptable and shows a real intolerance. also, god has chosen to make the womb the ONLY place (besides a petri dish) for human conception & limited a womb to the female gender. need i say more. something must be done immediately and we will boycott god until he makes the needed changes."

EVOLUTION IS FALSE SCIENCE- richurd jacabs of the coward campaign called on the Supreme Court to ban all schools from teaching creationism or evolution in schools. jacabs stated that "...evolution is as false as creation. darwin was a complete & utter bigot. the entire theory is a bunch of hogwash. if darwinism were true then we would have evolved in a much more just & tolerant way. why is it that after all this time a sphincter is still not a vagina? there can be only one explanation. this man was a true evil charlatan & his theories have no place in the world today, let alone being taught to young and impressionable children."